Some Reported Support Call Conversations |
(reported...no proof they really happened) |
| Customer: I'm trying to connect to the Internet with
your CD, but it just doesn't work. What am I doing wrong? Tech Suport: OK, you've got the CD in the CD drive, right? Customer: Yeah.... Tech Suport: And what sort of computer are you using? Customer: Computer? Oh no, I haven't got a computer. It's in the CD player and all I get is weird noises. Listen..... Tech Suport: Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!!! |
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| Tech Suport: What kind of computer do you have? Female Customer: A white one... |
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| Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my
diskette out. Tech Suport: Have you tried pushing the button? Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck. Tech Suport: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note. Customer: No .. wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry.... |
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| Tech Suport: Click on the 'my computer' icon on the
left of the screen. Customer: Your left or my left? |
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| Tech Suport: Good day. How may I help you? Male Customer: Hello... I can't print. Tech Suport: Would you click on "start" for me and... Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates, damn it! |
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| Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I
can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even
lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer
still says he can't find it... |
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| Customer: I have problems printing in black... Tech Suport: Do you have a color printer? Customer: Aaaah....................thank you. |
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| Tech Suport: What's on your monitor now, ma'am? Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket. |
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| Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore. Tech Suport: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer? Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer. Tech Suport: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back. Customer: OK Tech Suport: Did the keyboard come with you? Customer: Yes Tech Suport: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard? Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work |
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| Tech Suport: Your password is the small letter a as
in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7. Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters? |
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| Customer: I can't get on the Internet. Tech Suport: Are you sure you used the right password? Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it. Tech Suport: Can you tell me what the password was? Customer: Five stars. |
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| Tech Suport: What anti-virus program do you use? Customer: Netscape. Tech Suport: That's not an anti-virus program. Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer. |
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| Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed
a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it
disappears. |
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| Tech Suport: How may I help you? Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail. Tech Suport: OK, and what seems to be the problem? Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it? |
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| A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a
problem with her printer. Tech Suport: Are you running it under windows? Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine." |
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| Tech Suport: "Okay Bob, let's press the control
and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle
of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program
Manager." Customer: I don't have a P. Tech Suport: On your keyboard, Bob. Customer: What do you mean? Tech Suport: "P".....on your keyboard, Bob. Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!! |